Getting Well

I haven’t been able to work in my garden for two months. At the end of August I came down with a little cough that turned into bronchitis, then turned into pneumonia. On days when I feel good, I forget that I’m not well yet so I start doing stuff; until I start feeling like I can’t breathe, then I remember. I'm like a little child; I want to go outside and play!

I sit near the window or look longingly through the sliding glass patio doors and sigh, wishing I could go out and pull up some of the weeds that are trying to take over. My plants need me! My “friends” as I call them, seem to be calling out “WHERE ARE YOU? It’s getting cold and we can’t go to bed without you!” Stuff needs to be cut down, stuff needs to be mulched over, stuff needs to be dug up and put away, and stuff needs to be planted! Thinking about all of the things I need to do was beginning to overwhelm me. I know what you’re thinking; Why not just hire someone else to do it for you? Well for me that’s almost like hiring someone to put your kids to bed. Someone else may be able do it but will they add on the loving touches that can only come from you? I am particularly worried about my sixty or so potted perennials. They especially need protection from the upcoming winter.

I wrestled with the dilemma: Do I go take care of it myself, and risk getting sicker or do I leave it alone and hope they survive? The weather is very nice today, so maybe it won’t hurt me to be out there. These are my “friends” after all… As I fought off the urge to put on a face mask and head for the yard, I heard as plain as day, a quiet voice say to my heart: "Be still, and know that I am God…” In that instant, I realized that I was doing it again; Not recognizing when to let go and let God. That’s a habit I have; always pushing for My will be done. Proverb 3:5-6 says: Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths. It is foolish to even consider jeopardizing my health in such a way.

My nephew and his friend are here moving the pots to the place I designated to protect them from the wind and cold. My friends will be fine and if for some reason they are not, everything will still be okay.

The Serenity Prayer
by Reinhold Niebuhr


God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;

Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.

Amen.